Indeed, here I am at work, blogging. And this is because:
1. I can't check my email though I much prefer to procrastinate that way;
2. I can't even check the BBC site;
3. reading about the impending midterm elections is overwhelming, and also makes me feel guilty since I'm registered to vote in VA and didn't get an absetee ballot;
4. this site has not yet been blocked, but I feel sure it will be by the next time I try to log in.
But yes, you heard me right, I'm at w-o-r-k. Don't get too excited, it's a temp job. I worked here Thursday of last week, and got the call again this morning from my agency. It's not steady work by any means, but it's easy work, answering phones and smiling at people as they come and go. I probably have lots of time to revise my script, but then here I am blogging instead.
Two things are fascinating. First, yesterday evening, as I was walking home from my writing group, headed uptown towards the 96th street station on Broadway, I thought about getting something to eat. What I thought was, in this order:
What, I can't afford food!
Okay, fine, but something under a dollar, maybe a bagel or pizza?
Come on, I have raman noodles at home, all I have to do is boil water.
$2.25 for a slice of pizza! You gotta be kidding.
Sara said I should a vegetable; she's right, I should...
...which lead me to the following feeling, namely, that I could afford to buy a salad, even a $6 salad, because tomorrow I would be getting work. If I believe that I'm too poor to eat, then I will remain poor; I will be sending the message that this is who I am, a poor person who can't afford to eat, and that's how my Life will continue to reveal itself. However, if I truly believe that I will be working tomorrow -- and if not tomorrow, then tomorrow's tomorrow -- then I would get the salad; and in getting the salad I am sending the message that I have complete confidence that work will come. And I got the salad. And today I got called for work.
I'm exploring the concept that if you want something, you'll never get it. But if you believe you already have it, then you do.
The second thing which is fascinating about working in fashion here is that I thought for sure I'd be surrounded by gay men all day. Instead, I'm surrounded by men in yarmulkas. Who would have thought? I have nothing against Jewish people -- my last girlfriend was Chosen -- but the environment is a little more sedate than had I been surrounded by queens.
What can I say? I like royalty.
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1 comment:
Dear D,
I am very glad you got W-O-R-K. I check your blog almost everyday religiously, because I am worried about you.
I have addressed your last post on my blog. Check it out when u can..(preferrably without getting sacked for it :).
But I wish to recount what I posted there:
You will walk out of that place (read Harlem), with a confident stride, head held high and having achieved what you want to.
Getting temp work was a good idea, at least that will tide u over.
And use the 'believing that you have what you want' really works, at least for me, always without fail. That's how I got A, too...
Always with you...
Shiv (formerly R- remember?)
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